Sixteen foot armored weasel rhinoceros, nuclear platypus generator, Dolly Parton’s bra strap, No, i am none of these things, but i am like an electric meat Popsicle. Six foot tall and 200 pounds of electric meat Popsicle to be exact, introduced to a chilly freezer we call earth.Truthfully that is just about all were made up of water, carbon based meat, with a calcium support stick sending electrical currents making our jolly electrode carrying meat parts move around. In the end serving my purpose and being consumed by the universal being called the average humanlife, that is unless somehow my tastes change to that which is undesirable by the average humanlife.
The universe can be a cold place but earth can be even colder with its harsh temperature changes and its general aptitude towards being one tough mother. Being like an electric meat Popsicle in this environment could result in disaster especially if the heat were to get to me and i ended up worthless, shriveled up, like a dried prune on a stick. Luckily and quite to the contrary though i live in a great society, a society which if i start out with a nice enough wrapping will keep me very stable and not show me the too many hard ships except maybe some cellular damage from freezer burn, nothing that cant be brushed off so i look good when i finally go. Even luckier still i am one of many more like me but that have many different tastes and sizes in this frozen world of ice and frozen life; it’s cool though for far more important meals that may take my place but at least i wont have to worry about leaving my temperature controlled home ’til later in my end days.
I am here to serve the all powerful freon system ’til my final days when my purpose is needed and remain complacent praying only that the power won’t go out ’til then. Serving my purpose wholeheartedly it shouldn’t go off though and maybe if i serve long enough i can buy some gold wrapper or a nice suit to go somewhere else for a while or maybe even a transfer ticket to a different better freezer. But being like a electric meat Popsicle, i think a lot about what some of the other not as important meat snacks think, what happens if i wanna be a burger patty or even a steak dinner you know move up the corporate snack ladder reprocessed into a better standing food. Furthermore i sometimes even dare delve into the controversial thinking of being like one of the outcasts. The ones that took the plunge out of the great freons game and went out into the heat not only to melt away what they once were but become something more still, more than even the luckiest born and best seasoned fillet minion, to the realm of the toughest of the tough and most experienced in all tastes to the wild untameable jerky. This proclivity to life which buys them that certain undesirability to the average humanlife sometimes makes me smile; but then i remember where I’m at and that I’ve got a lot of work to do tomorrow aging and what not to do and it would take me along time and far too much hard times for me to be like jerky, that’s why for now i know I’m more like a meat Popsicle than anything else.
by Bob Marvin