By: Michael Martini
Switch on your TV and follow me
to a place where they’ll all know our names.
Where “three’s company” and we’ll make a “full house”
even so they’re all glad that we came.
“Step by Step” we’ll find out “who’s the boss” of the tube
as we dine with “the king of queens”
Become “bosom buddies” with Carrie and Doug
while we watch Tony Danza clean.
So turn on your TV and come with me
as we “taxi” from station to station.
from Bel-air to Lanford and back again
in the timeliest of fashion.
We’ll go from “perfect strangers” to the best of “friends”
in a little under an hour.
Just a flick of the wrist and we’re “married with children”
all thanks to some battery power.
So turn on your cable if you’re willing and able
and know that we’re “mad about you”
it’s “the facts of life” that you’ll never be “Lost”
with “Charles in Charge” of you.
“Seinfeld” and “Frasier” “George Lopez”, “Roseanne”
“Will and Grace” and even “Black Adder”
We’re “All in the family” together my friend
And it’s only the “Family [that] Matters”