Skipping Under Ladders

19 Nov

By Nicole Badiali

Even when I fall, I still itch to climb up the ladder
Scratching at the wall for another ride on the rafters
While combing for the gall to venture mind over matter
So here I am wedged, hangin’ by a thread
Tryin’ to make sense of all the things they said
Screaming blasphemy inside to those pre-occupied friends
Wishing the last of me saw life through a less blotchier lens
Drowning out all that matters, I allow it to get rid of me
I continue up the ladder even though it’s kind of rickety
And once it tips back, it’s too late to come down
And I land face-flat, stabbing straight through the ground
Maybe I’ll finally meet eyes with the life I chose to push out
The girl who always runs in hopes that someone will catch her
That same girl who’s stupidly strollin’ under the ladders
Forever searching for that wholesome mother of laughter
About the ninth time back around, I finally ducked the ladder’s climb
Settled with this everlasting hound, oh what battered times
Still, you always wonder how much farther you are from them
And you’ll always ponder how much sharper you could’ve been
If only you hadn’t sauntered like a martyr to the other end

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