By: Brandie Hyde
(A parody of “The Scotsman” originally performed by Bryan Bowers, original lyrics
by Mike Cross; Pirate themed adaptation)
Well a
pi-rate dressed in fine at-tire,
left the tav-ern he’d en-dared
It was
clear, by how he slur-ed his words,
that his poor liv-er had failed.
He stum-bled till was fin-nally forced
to yield; admit defeat,
then he craw-led in-to a
cor-ner
where he prom-ptly fell
a-sleep.
Yo ho
mat-ties!
un-der brutes for loots!
yo ho mate-il-ies my boot!
He crawled in-to a cor-ner
where he promp-tly fell
a-sleep.
Soon there
af-ter,
maid-en wench-es
wand-erd close near-by.
One whis-pers to the oth-er,
with some mis-chief on her mind.
“Let’s check that sleep-ing pi-rate,
bat-tle worn of pun-gent smell,
and see –for all their
brag-gin’
what they pack be-neath the
belt!
Yo ho
mat-ties!
un-der brutes for loots!
yo ho mate-il-ies my boot!
and see –for all their
brag-gin’
what they pack be-neath the
belt!
Exam-ined
for a min-unte,
then one says, they must move-on,
but as we de-part,
de-vise some art,
be-fore we all are gone.
They placed a ring of flow-ers,
‘round his pri-vate pi-rate mast,
for the gift of
in-for-ma-tion,
that their friend had just sur-passed
Yo ho
mat-ties!
un-der brutes for loots!
yo ho mat-il-ies my boot!
for the gift of
in-for-ma-tion,
that their friend had just sur-passed
Our pi-rate
wakes,
to par-rot’s squawk,
and crawls to the la-trine.
Dis-robes to ans-wer liq-uor’s urge,
and balks at this odd scene.
And with a
tone of star-tle,
to that which greets his eye,
“Well I’ve No i-dea just where ye been,
but it’s clear ye earned a prize!”
Yo ho
mat-ties!
un-der brutes for loots!
yo ho mat-il-ies my boot!
“Well I’ve No i-dea just where ye been,
but it’s clear ye earned a P-R-I-Z-E !!!”
BIO:
The past eighteen months have been, to put it politely, challenging. Essentially the end of life as I previously knew it. The return to college life following more than a decade hiatus has been, well… let’s call it colorful. I managed to survive my first semester back in the swing of things and am currently working on a second. It is my goal to complete an Associate in Arts Degree by December 2013 and continue on to study Criminal Justice Forensics.